|
SubscriptionsSites I Read
|
|
|
|
| How are you? Don't know why I've been feeling so sad lately. Is it because I'm a year older? Feeling the birthday blues? What is it...? I feel so down, the different type of down as I was feeling before. In fact, I was feeling desperation more than pure depression two months back. Now I'm feeling more like loneliness, real loneliness. It must be after telling him that I'm falling out of love, which is not exactly true. It's a little bit true but not true at all actually. I can't be out of love if I think about him everyday. I can't be out of love if I have a little breakdown everytime I hear his name. ehhh, is it really this? Or is it something else? Transition... I'm not really ready for change. I don't feel very comfortable with myself lately. I'm stumbling with my words. My confidence level is low. I need some love. I was drawing off confidence from him, now I'm left on my own. Should I tell him that I'm still thinking about him? hmmm. It doesn't help with anything though. I can't leave. I'm not going anywhere for another year. I don't know what I want in life. What's my next step? I had the excuse of finishing off my masters degree, but then what? Then... when can I finally live? Live like a real person instead of waiting, over and over again, just waiting and waiting. ehhh if he's the answer then I have to keep waiting.
| | |
| Finances
- must freeze using American Express card, cannot afford to use it anymore
- must use Citibank Premiere card instead
- must register for HKU SPACE card for 10 month installment interest-free payment for CFA preparatory course
- my finances are totally under water - my excuse is that I'm investing in myself, the good news is the double pay at the end of the year, that will save my ass, also my original debt is maturing at the end of the year, this means I should be frugal for the next 4 months, i.e. last quarter.
Beauty
- must do facial at least once a week
- must use all Modern Beauty spa tickets - I have about 40 left, that's more than a year's worth
| | |
| so I love my baby, and because I do, I have to set him free, let him go, let him roam, let him find his own path on his own. I can't live his life for him, I just have to trust that our lives could go the same direction in the future. I just need to believe and leave him alone to think for himself. I know he's working hard, so I should work hard for myself too. I'm going to work really really hard until the end of the year. I just need to have faith, work hard, and luck will lead me to happiness!!
| | |
| baby is working really hard. I need to trust him. He cares about me and he's not going to just fool around. He's sorting his life out. I don't need to be worried. I trust my baby.
| | |
| baby's gone... it hurts. Just remember how lonely I was during Christmas day, it feels exactly like that.
| | |
|
